– When are you going to
introduce me to your parents? – Never intentionally. Would your parents be, like, down with me? – I would probably lie and
tell them that we were dating. – That would be weird. I would not be into that. I’m Anya. – My name’s Owen. And we met on Bumble, but–
– That’s not really true. We met in like first grade. And then reconnected–
– Earlier this year. – On the internet, Bumble. Yeah. So we don’t hang out in public very much. Most of the time we hang
out, it’s horizontal. Like twice per week maybe. More than that and then it’s like, that’s a lot of time
to spend with a person. – Ladies first. (mumbles) – Would you have a three-way with me? – Yeah. Would you have a three-way with me? – Yeah.
– Okay. – Cool. – (chuckles) What’s the kinkiest thing you’d like to try with me? – You’re really kinda
vanilla so I don’t really wanna try it with you. – Oh, okay. If you wanna do this,
you’ve never asked me, so you have no idea that
I wouldn’t wanna do it. – Okay well what’s some
kinky shit you wanna do? – I don’t know, like ropes are fun, or belts or something
like that, I don’t know. – Yeah, you should tie me up. – Okay. – I thought you were so vanilla. Okay (chuckles), how would
you rate my oral sex skills out of 10? – Probably an eight. – I feel like it should be higher. – Wow, okay. An eight is very good. How would you rate my oral sex skills? – I’d say like an eight also. – See, I would take that, you know? On the count of three,
name who likes who more in this relationship. – It’s equal.
– You. Oh. (gasps and chuckles) Whoa. Hey, you’re the one texting me more often. (person off-screen laughing) – Yeah, that’s just ’cause like, I don’t know. Okay, what should we
call our relationship? – I mean friends with benefits, that’s really the classic term. – When I talk to my
friends, I would say that you’re a dude who I bang sometimes. Who is like cool and also my friend, and I think you’re like
a decent, cool person. – Great. I’ve described you as a girl
that I’ve been hooking up with. – Right.
– For awhile. – Yeah. – Does it hurt your feelings when I sleep with people that aren’t you? – No. – Okay. – Does it hurt your feelings
when I sleep with people that aren’t you? – I’m not actively happy about it. I don’t ask her about it, I don’t really– – See I didn’t actually
know that you didn’t wanna hear about it necessarily. – Are you sleeping with other people? – Yeah. – Okay. – How sad would you be if
we never had sex again? – Bummed. – Yeah, I’d be bummed.
– Like it’s fun, it’s a really good time. – Cool, I think that’s exactly the answer I would have wanted. – Yeah, it’d be a bummer. It’s a good thing we got going, I think. – I know, it’s fun. It’s you?
– Yeah. – Yeah. – Why, oof. Why would it be bad for us to be in a committed relationship? – You are too sleepy! (chuckles) (sighs) “I’m gonna go to bed. “I’m tired.” – Right, yes. – Also I feel like you would wanna be in a monogamous relationship
and I definitely wouldn’t. We haven’t talked about that. – Yeah, you’re right about that. I accepted that awhile ago I guess. – Also I’m just too fucking busy. – Yeah, that’s fair. Read the last booty call I sent you. – (sighs) You guys
should make some coffee. – Oh my God.
– I’m gonna scroll back. – It’s not that. – Oh here’s one, this is from July 31st, I said, “Hey, what you up to tonight?” And he said, “You should come over.” – Oh, ha! (chuckles) “You wanna come through on
your previous proposition “and fuck my brains out?” This is 10:30 on Monday night. I gotta say, you kept me
up late a couple times and I’ve felt like death
the next morning ’cause– – Sorry.
– I got five hours of sleep. – What would happen if we got pregnant? – Oh. – I feel like it’s a really simple answer. – Yeah, I mean, I would
assume you’d have an abortion. – Yeah, yeah. Also, I have an IUD, I’m not
fucking getting pregnant. There’s this much chance and we like, use a barrier method
of protection as well. Yeah.
– Yeah. I’ll read the last one. – Yeah (mumbles). – What’s the expiration
date on our relationship? – I don’t know, when someone’s not into it or gets into a relationship or moves away. – Yeah, I’d say so. Like go out on the weekend, talk to women, see if I meet someone.
– Talk to women. (chuckles) I’m not actively seeking a relationship but if it came along, that would be fine. – Cheers to whatever this is– – Being friends who also
can bang and have it not be a fucking big deal. (glasses clink)
– To that. (chuckles) – What time is it? We should go bang.
– Oh my God. Unbelievable.